Being an older cow

Must be the moon or something, but this week I feel like the older cow has taken a hammering at work. Couldn't quite put my finger on why I was feeling so pissy this week until Granty sent me this email in his weekly TGIF mail out - and oldie buy a goodie and I think it bears repeating.

"This is for all you girls 40 years and over .... and for those who are turning 40, and for those who are scared of moving into their 50's ...AND 60's ... and for guys who are scared of girls over 40!!!!

Andy Rooney says:As I grow in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

*A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask,"What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
*If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And,it's usually something more interesting.
*A woman over 40 knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is,what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 40 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing.
*Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
*Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.
*A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women.
*Women over 40 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.
*Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. They always know.
*A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
*Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately,it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot womanof 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free", here's an update for you. Now 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage"I must remember on Monday to email it to all the "bright young things" in the office who have decided to believe their own publicity! Don't get me wrong - these are lovely, inspiring young women who can make me laugh & cry in equal measure. It's just that sometimes they start to believe that they invented child birth and parenting. They are the only ones who have partied, loved. Only they, at under 30 have ever had an intelligent thought or education.

It came to a head in a curious way. We were doing a shared task around a conference table and chatting away as you do. One of the slightly older women, after telling a "story" of her darling baby son made the "mistake" of commenting "I just love that boy to bits!", to which one of the very much younger women commented "Well if you love him so much why the fuck don't you stay home with him?".

Of course the Madcow couldn't possibly let that one pass by without a good hoof stamping including such phrases as "clean your mouth up" and "how dare you assume that you know anything about any woman's life or circumstance!" and "you will apologise and show some respect if you know whats good for you!"

But then it struck me that this kind of behaviour/comment is becoming more and more acceptable. If you are over 40 apparently you have no career ambition. Just watch the number of appointments for extra responsibility that are given to young women over older women BY recruiting panels of younger women. If you are over 40 you are presumed to be working for the "fun" of it, that you have a husband/partner paying the bills and your earnings are no more than "pin money".

If you are over 40 and do not have a university education you don't know anything. If you are over 40 and do have a university education you are "out of date".

Some how all the years we older women spent keeping our homes together count for nothing. Apparently our babies were born and nurtured by idiots. The fact we don't know how to use a DVD player (substitute ANY appliance etc here) is a reason for ridicule despite the fact we chose to pay our mortgages/rent rather than fall into the trap of consumerism gone mad. We don't know "what's really going on" when we treat middle aged male managers etc with a healthy dose of cynicsm when they try to flatter female employees into some sort of subservient handmaiden role.

To be honest, it's a wonder I ever find my way to work in the morning.

Well all you young things ... us old chicks are here to stay for quite a bit longer. We have lived through more social change than you will ever dream of. We now not only parent our children but we get to parent our parents as well. We know the value of a dollar and more importantly the value of a friend. We have secrets and passions. We love and have been loved. You're doing something for the first time ... honey, we've done it a dozen times over and now we're good at it!

And if you ever get an ounce of commonsense in your head you will try to become our friends because one of these days you're going to need us!